I-COVID-19: Ungakubuyisa Kanjani Ukulawula

Izinhlekelele zaziwa ngokunyakazisa imiphakathi emathanjeni, kepha zimbalwa kakhulu izinhlekelele ezibangela uhlobo olufanayo lokwesaba njengobhadane. [1] Yize abantu bethinteka ngezindlela eziningi ezahlukahlukene, okusihlanganisayo umqondo wokungabi namandla okulawula nokukhathazeka noma ukwesaba ngekusasa. Ngamafuphi, sizizwa engenamandla . Abanye bethu bangaba nomuzwa wokuthi lo muzwa wokungabi namandla usicindezele phansi futhi usithikameze ukuqhubeka nezimpilo zethu; sintula amandla futhi sikuthola kunzima ukugxila. Njengoba sibhekene nokuphazamiseka okunzima okungaqhubeka izinyanga uma kungenjalo iminyaka, yini esingayenza ukuze sisuse leyo mizwa futhi siphakamise lawo mafu engqondo?

Imibhalo yesayensi kwi-psychology yamandla inganikeza ukubuyiswa okuthile. Kule mibhalo, siyazi ukuthi amandla — amandla okuthonya nokulawula izinsizakusebenza nemiphumela — yisimo somqondo njengoba sikhombisa ukuma kwabantu noma isikhundla sabo ngokusemthethweni. [2] Siyazi futhi ukuthi kungenzeka ukufeza isimo somqondo esinikwe amandla ngalokho mhlawumbe okuchazwa kangcono yisisho esithi ‘ ikhohlise uze uyenze. ’ Ngamanye amagama, singalingisa labo abasezikhundleni — sicabange futhi senze ngendlela efanayo futhi ngokwenza kanjalo sinqobe imizwa yethu yokungabi namandla. [3-6] Ake singene siqonde kuyo. Nazi izindlela eziyisikhombisa esingazinikeza amandla ngazo ngokulandela isibonelo salabo abasemandleni:

1. Beka kuqala. Abantu abanamandla bahle ekubekeni izinto phambili; basebenza kanzima uma kuyisikhathi sokusebenza, futhi badlala ngokuzikhandla uma sekuyisikhathi sokudlala. [7] Ngokuphambene, lapho sizizwa singenamandla siyaphazamiseka kalula; singagcina siphequlula i-inthanethi (ngokungenanjongo) ngesikhathi somsebenzi, futhi sikhanyisa ngomsebenzi lapho kuyisikhathi sokuphumula noma sokuzijabulisa. Ngakho konke okwenzekayo, singagxila kanjani ekubhekaneni nomsebenzi owodwa ngesikhathi? Kuyasiza ukubeka imigomo emincane, ephathekayo. [8] Lokhu kungasho ukugxila, ithi, imizuzu eyi-10 emsebenzini, kulandelwe ikhefu (ngenhloso echaziwe nesimo sokuphela). Abantu abanamandla abaziwa ngokuzitika ngokugxeka, ngakho-ke ungabi nzima kuwe uma uphazamiseka; ukuzijwayeza kwenza kuphelele.

2. Lalela umzimba wakho. Lokhu kungamangaza kepha abantu abanamandla nabo bavame ukuhambisana kakhulu nemizimba yabo. Kusho ukuthini lokhu? Okokuqala, kusho ukuthi abantu abanamandla bakuthola kulula ukubona izimpawu zomzimba ezifana nokushaya kwenhliziyo yabo. [9] Okwesibili, kusho ukuthi abantu abanamandla bayazivumela ukuholwa yimizwa yabo. [10] Masithathe ukudla njengesibonelo: Uyeka ukudla lapho ipuleti lingenalutho (isignali yangaphandle), noma lapho ungasalambi (isignali yangaphakathi)? Imizwa yamandla idala ukuxhumana phakathi kwangaphakathi nangaphandle komhlaba, futhi lokhu kuxhumana kuyanqanyulwa lapho sizizwa singenamandla. Ukucabangela kanye nokuphefumula izivivinyo kungavula umnyango wezwe lethu elingaphakathi, le-visceral, ngezinzuzo ezaziwa ngenhlalakahle yethu yonke kanye nemizwa yokulawula. [11]

3. Lungiselela izikhathi ezinhle. UHenry Kissinger uchaze ngamandla amandla 'njenge-aphrodisiac'. Kodwa-ke, ngokungafani nenkolelo evamile yokuba namandla futhi kukodwa akubenzi abantu bajabule. Esikhundleni salokho, amandla anika abantu inkululeko yokufuna okuhlangenwe nakho okuhle kanye namandla okujabulela umzuzu. Ngokweqile, okuhlangenwe nakho okuhle akudingi izinto ezibizayo noma zikanokusho. Eqinisweni, izifundo okukhulunywe ngazo lapha zazinababambiqhaza abalalela umculo oqhuqisayo noma babuke izithombe ezinhle. [12]

4. Yamukela ukuthi kulungile (futhi akuvamile) ukuzizwa uphansi; gxila ekuqhubekeni. Yize amandla esho ukusebenzisa okuhle kokuhlangenwe nakho okuhle, awasho ukuthi uzizwa umuhle ngaso sonke isikhathi. Abantu abanamandla banokuhlangenwe nakho okungekuhle, futhi bazizwa bebabi njengabanye lapho izinto zihamba njengepheya. Okuhlukanisa labo abazizwa benamandla nalabo abazizwa bengenamandla yikhono lokuqhubekela phambili nokubuyela emuva. [13] Okunye kwalokho kudinga ukwenza umzamo oqondile; ngokwesibonelo, ukwenza kabusha isimo ngenkuthalo, ukuthatha isinyathelo emuva ngamabomu, nokuguqula ukugxila komuntu. [14]

5. Dayela phansi ubuchopho bakho bezenhlalo. Inani elihle lamandla ethu obuchopho lichithwa ekufundiseni abanye — ukucabanga ngalokho abanye abantu abakucabangayo. Lapho sizizwa singenamandla, lolu hlobo lokuqonda lungena ekushayeleni ngokweqile. [15] Ukwengeza kulokho kuyisifiso sokubikezela ukuthi kwenzekani ngokulandelayo, okungathi ezimweni zamanje kungasho ukuzama ukuthatha isinyathelo esilandelayo sezikhulu. Abantu abanamandla bakhetha ukunamathela ezweni labo lengqondo ngaphandle kwalapho kufanele babe nokuqonda, noma bazimisele ukwenza njalo. Baphinde bakhuthazwa ngokwabo kunabanye. [16] Ukugxila lapha namanje, nasezintweni umuntu akwazi ukuzilawula nokuzilawula kungakunika amandla. [17]

6. Yiba nguwe. Gcina okumbalwa, abantu abanamandla abanesidingo esincane sokuziqinisekisa, futhi bakhathazeka kancane ngokuthi bazokwahlulelwa kanjani abanye. [18] Ngenxa yalokho, abantu abanamandla bathola umuzwa omkhulu wobuqiniso, obukhulisa inhlalakahle yabo. [19] Ukuxhumana okukude nemithombo yezokuxhumana kungakhuphula umkhuba wokufuna ukuqinisekiswa kwabanye. [20] Imithombo yezokuxhumana nayo ingabukela phansi ubuqiniso uma abantu bezama ukuziveza ngezindlela ezingajwayelekile noma ezingezona ezemvelo. [21] Kubalulekile ukuthi wazi izingqinamba ezingaba khona zokuyeka ubuqiniso ezweni ledijithali.

7. Yiba nomusa futhi uthethelele. Abantu abanamandla imvamisa abazona izibonelo zangempela uma kukhulunywa ngokufudumala nokunakekela, kepha kunezinto ezimbalwa esingazifunda kubo ngobudlelwano. Ucwaningo lukhombisa ukuthi abantu abanamandla baxolela kakhulu ebudlelwaneni obubalulekile (abangani, umndeni). [22] Inkinga yamanje ingaba yisikhathi esihle sokungcwaba i-hatchet nabantu abake basondelene. Ngomqondo ofanayo, abantu abanamandla — ikakhulukazi labo abazizwa bephephile — nabo bavame ukungakhathazwa kakhulu ukona kwabanye abantu futhi abaziphindiseli kakhulu. [23] Amandla nokuzilawula — izithiyo zokungabi namandla — akuveli ezingxabanweni noma ekuxolelaneni ngentukuthelo, kodwa kuvela emseni nasekuxoleleni. [24]

[2] UGalinsky, A. D., Gruenfeld, D. H., & Magee, J. C. (2003). Kusuka emandleni kuye esenzweni. Ijenali Yobuntu Nesayensi Yezenhlalo, 85, 453-466. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.85.3.453

[3] UCuddy, A. J., Schultz, S. J., & Fosse, N. E. (2018). I-P-curving umzimba ophelele wocwaningo ngempendulo engemuva kwembula inani elicacile lobufakazi bemiphumela yokwenza amandla: Phendula uSimmons noSimonsohn (2017). Isayensi Yezengqondo, 29, 656-666. https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797617746749

[4] USmith, P. K., McCulloch, K. C., noSchouwstra, A. (2013). Ukusondela eduze ukufinyelela phezulu: Indlela yokuziphatha inyusa umqondo womuntu wamandla. Ukuqashelwa Komphakathi, 31, 518-529. https://doi.org/10.1521/soco_2012_1007

[5] USmith, P. K., Wigboldus, D. H., noDijksterhuis, A. P. (2008). Ukucabanga okungabonakali kwandisa amandla omuntu. Ijenali ye-Experimental Social Psychology, 44, 378-385. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2006.12.005

[6] Stel, M., Dijk, E. V., Smith, P. K., Dijk, W. W. V., & Djalal, F. M. (2012). Ukwehlisa ukuphakama kwezwi lakho kukwenza uzizwe unamandla ngokwengeziwe futhi ucabange ngendlela engaqondakali. Isayensi Yezenhlalo Nezengqondo, 3, 497-502. https://doi.org/10.1177/1948550611427610

[7] IGuinote, A. (2008). Amandla namandla: Lapho isimo sinamandla amakhulu ngaphezu kwamandla kunabantu abangenamandla. Ijenali Yobuntu Nesayensi Yezenhlalo, 95, 2237-252. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0012518

[8] UStock, J., noCervone, D. (1990). Proximal yokubeka imigomo nezinqubo zokuzilawula. Ukwelashwa Nokucwaninga Okucabangayo, 14, 483-498. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/BF01172969

[9] UMoeini-Jazani, M., Knoeferle, K., de Molière, L., Gatti, E., & Warlop, L. (2017). Amandla ezenhlalo akhulisa ukunemba okucabangayo. Imingcele ku-Psychology, 8, 1322. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2017.01322

[10] Weick, M., & Guinote, A. (2008). Lapho okuhlangenwe nakho kokuzithoba kunendaba: Amandla akhulisa ukuthembela ekutholakaleni kalula. Ijenali Yobuntu Nesayensi Yezenhlalo, 94, 956–970. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.94.6.956

[11] UKeng, S. L., Smoski, M. J., noRobins, C. J. (2011). Imiphumela yokucabangela empilweni yezengqondo: Ukubuyekezwa kwezifundo ezinamandla. Ukubuyekezwa KweClinical Psychology, 31, 1041-1056. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2011.04.006

[12] ULeach, S., noWeick, M. (2018). Ukusuka ekukhathazekeni kuya ekujabuleni (nasemuva): Amandla ayithinta kanjani imizwa ngaphakathi nangaphansi kwezimo ezahlukahlukene. Ijenali ye-Experimental Social Psychology, i-79, 107-114. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2018.05.004

[13] ULeach, S., noWeick, M. (2020). Ukulawula imizwa yomuntu: Ukuzwa kwamandla nokuthinta ukulawulwa. Ubuntu Nokwehluka Ngabanye, 161, 109958. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2020.109958

[14] UParkinson, B., noTotterdell, P. (1999). Ukuhlukanisa amasu wokulawulwa komthelela. Ukuqaphela nokuzwela, 13, 277-303. https://doi.org/10.1080/026999399379285

[15] UFiske, S. T., & Dépret, E. (1996). Ukulawula, ukuthembana, namandla: Ukuqonda ukuqonda komphakathi esimweni sayo senhlalo. KuW. Stroebe & M. Hewstone (Eds.), Ukubuyekezwa kwe-European Psychology Yezenhlalo (Umq. 7, amakhasi 31-61). ENew York: Wiley. https://doi.org/10.1080/14792779443000094

[16] UVan Kleef, G. A., Oveis, C., Homan, A. C., van der Löwe, I., noKeltner, D. (2015). Amandla akwenza uphakame: Abanamandla bakhuthazwa kakhulu yibo kunabanye. Isayensi Yezenhlalo Nezengqondo, 6, 472-480. https://doi.org/10.1177/1948550614566857

[17] ICardaciotto, L., Herbert, J. D., Forman, E. M., Moitra, E., & Farrow, V. (2008). Ukuhlolwa kokuqwashiswa nokwamukelwa kwamanje: Isilinganiso se-Philadelphia Mindfulness. Ukuhlola, 15, 204-223. https://doi.org/10.1177/1073191107311467

[18] UCai, W., & Wu, S. (2017). Abantu abanamandla bazizwa bengesabi ukuhlolwa okungekuhle. I-Social Psychology, i-48, 85-91. https://doi.org/10.1027/1864-9335/a000299

[19] UKifer, Y., Heller, D., Perunovic, W. Q. E., noGalinsky, A. D. (2013). Impilo enhle yabanamandla: Isipiliyoni samandla nobuqiniso sithuthukisa inhlalakahle ehambisanayo. Isayensi Yezengqondo, 24, 280-288. https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797612450891

[20] UNesi, J., & Prinstein, M. J. (2015). Kusetshenziswa imithombo yezokuxhumana ukuqhathanisa okuphakathi nokufuna impendulo: Ubulili nokuthandwa okuphakathi okunezimpawu zokudangala. Ijenali Yengane Psychology Engavamile, 43, 1427-1438. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10802-015-0020-0

[21] Reinecke, L., & Trepte, S. (2014). Ubuqiniso nenhlalakahle kumasayithi wokuxhumana nomphakathi: Ucwaningo lwama-wave longitudinal ngemiphumela yobuqiniso obuku-inthanethi kanye nokukhetha okuhle kwezokuxhumana kwe-SNS. Amakhompyutha ekuziphatheni kwabantu, i-30, 95-102. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2013.07.030

[22] AmaKarremans, uJ. C., noSmith, uPK K. (2010). Ukuba namandla okuxolela: Lapho ulwazi ngamandla lukhulisa ukuthethelelana phakathi kwabantu. Ubuntu kanye ne-Social Psychology Bulletin, 36, 1010-1023. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167210376761

[23] UStrelan, P., Weick, M., noVasiljevic, M. (2014). Amandla nokuziphindiselela. IBritish Journal of Social Psychology, 53, 521-540. https://doi.org/10.1111/bjso.12044

[24] UFredrickson, B. L., Cohn, M. A., Coffey, K. A., Pek, J., & Finkel, S. M. (2008). Izinhliziyo ezivulekile zakha izimpilo: Imizwa emihle, ebangelwa ukuzindla ngomusa wothando, yakha izinsiza zomuntu ezilandelayo. Ijenali Yobuntu Nesayensi Yezenhlalo, 95, 1045-1062. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0013262