Indlela uLisa Lampanelli Amtholile Ngayo 'I-Choir' Yakhe

ULisa Lampanelli ungitshele ukuthi ngenkathi ehambele umhlangano wokucobelelana ngolwazi, umholi womhlangano uthe, “Yenza uhlu lwabantu 'ekhwayeni' lakho .... Uma ungekho ohlwini lwakho, khona-ke wenza okuthile okungalungile.

"Kufanele ube ngasohlangothini lwakho ngempela."

Kuzo zonke izinto ezifezwe nguLampanelli - ukuba yilungu leqembu leFriar's Club, ama-roast akhe adumile eComedy Central kanye nezici zakhe zamahlaya - ukuba ngasohlangothini lwakhe bekungeyona into akwazi ukuyenza. Futhi ngenxa yalokho, uzizwe enesizungu futhi engenalutho, imvamisa egcwalisa leso sikhala ngokudla.

Kepha manje, ngomdlalo wakhe omusha othi "Stuffed" - lapho ekhuluma khona nobuso obuningi bokuphazamiseka kokudla nobunzima - ekugcineni uLampanelli ukwazile ukuba ngasohlangothini lwakhe. Futhi uthole ukuthi uma useqenjini lakho, uyingxenye yekhwaya yakho, ungakunqoba ukuzizwa uwedwa.

ULampanelli wakhulela emndenini obumbene owawungavumeli inkululeko enkulu. “Abazali bami babeqinile ... Yayingekho inkululeko enkulu, ”kuchaza yena. “Lokhu bekwenzeka eminyakeni edlule, ngakho bekunocingo olulodwa endlini, futhi beluxhunywe odongeni ekhishini. Ngakho-ke bezingekho izimfihlo eziningi ongaba nazo. Awukwazanga ukushibilika uhlangane nabangane. ”

Ngenkathi imvelo yomndeni wakhe kungenzeka ukuthi ibizizwa icindezela kwesinye isikhathi, ibuye inikeze umqondo ocacile wokuthi umndeni wakhe ubumfuna eduze futhi ubumfuna. Lokhu kwanikeza uLampanelli inkululeko yokuzizwa sengathi ukuhlala yedwa kwakungeyona into embi kangako.

"Bengisendaweni ethile phakathi kwengane elahlekile nomaskandi," esho. “Ingane elahlekile iyanyamalala, kodwa ungayithola phezulu ifunda noma idweba noma yenza umculo noma okuthile. Kepha nami ngangiyi-mascot, futhi - hhayi impela lowo ongahlekisa, kepha yilowo onganciphisa ukungezwani okuthile endlini. Ngangihlala ngikuthanda ukuba wedwa ngenkathi ngazi ukuthi akuyona into ezenzakalelayo.

"Bekungukukhetha."

Ngokufanayo, uLampanelli wakwazi ukuthola abantu esikoleni ababenombono wakhe omangazayo emhlabeni. “Ngandlela thile ngithole abangani esikoleni, ngoba bebenjengemiqondo efanayo, nabo. Bekuwuhlobo lwe-‘Freaks and Geeks ’,” kusho yena.

Kepha lowo cocoon waphuka lapho uLampanelli eya ekolishi, lapho azizwa ekhethwe yedwa futhi enqanyuliwe kontanga yakhe. "Esikhundleni sokungena ezindlini nabantu abasha, lapho nonke nisemkhunjini ofanayo, bengingomunye wabangenamashwa abafakwa efulethini labantu abane nabadala abathathu abebengenakukhathazeka nami," ekhumbula. "Futhi bekufanele ngithole itoho, elingenze ngazizwa nginesizungu kakhulu, ngoba bengiphumile ekhempasini."

Ngokokuqala ngqa, ukuba wedwa kwakungeyona inketho. “Bengingazizwa ngikulungele ukuhamba ekhaya, ngoba bekungasekho nkululeko kuye kuyo yonke inkululeko. Futhi bengifana nokuthi, ‘O, Nkulunkulu wami, angazi ukuthi ngenzani ekolishi,” kusho uLampanelli. “Bekubonakala bengekho abantu abacabanga ngokufana lapho bengikhona ... Bengingenabo abomndeni. Bengingenayo ikwaya .... Kwakungekho netha lokuphepha.

"Ngakho-ke umzuzu nje lapho abazali bami bahamba, ngangingedwa."

Ngokushesha, uLampanelli waphendukela ekudleni ukuze avale lesi sikhala. “Ngicabanga ukuthi ukuba wedwa yikhona okungiholele ekudleni .... Ukudla kwakuyinetha lokuphepha lokuzizwa uwedwa. Njengoba umndeni wami ubungaphuzi, futhi asenzanga lutho ngaphandle kokudla, ngoba besingamaNtaliyane - nokuyinto ebungazwa ukwenziwa - kulapho-ke ngiphendukele ekudleni ukuze ngizizwe ngingcono, ”kusho yena. “Futhi isinqumo esinjengalesi ... Awusho, 'Ngizodla ngoba kungenza ngizizwe ngingcono.'

“Vele uhambe,‘ Kulungile, anginakho okunye. ’”

Njengoba ekhula isisindo, uLampanelli wathola ukuthi ukuzethemba kwakhe kwehla. Esikhundleni sokwamukela nokuzisekela, wazenyeza futhi wazenyanya yena nomzimba wakhe. Ngenxa yalokhu, akazange nje azizwe kabi ngaye, kodwa futhi wazizwa ekhubazekile ukwenza ushintsho.

“Ngaze ngehliswa isisindo, bekunokuthile ngaphakathi kimi okwathi,‘ Uyazizonda, ’” echaza. “Uthola ukucindezeleka okukhulu ngenxa yesisindo ukuze usebenze ngempela kulokhu. Nganoma yisiphi isizathu, bekufanele ngehlise isisindo sokwenza lo msebenzi. ”

U-Lampanelli uzame izinhlelo eziningi zokwehlisa isisindo, kubandakanya ukudla, ama-Overeaters Anonymous, ukwelashwa kanye nezinhlelo zokuhlala "zokuvuselela ukudla". Akukho lutho olusebenzayo futhi wazizwa ebambekile. Ngokubheka emuva, ucabanga ukuthi ingxenye yenkinga ukuthi wayefuna "inhlamvu yemilingo" ezomsiza ukuthi aqonde futhi axazulule izinkinga zakhe zokudla nezesisindo.

"Bengihlala ngifuna umbani othi 'Kungani ngidla?' Angicabangi ukuthi iyoke ibe khona impendulo eyodwa yokuthi kungani ngijwayele ukudla, ”kusho yena.

Ekugcineni, uLampanelli wanquma ukusetha kabusha ukuze ahlinzwe imikhono esiswini ukuze anciphise isisindo. "Ngiqhubeke nokubhonga ngaze ngaba neminyaka engama-50. Yilapho-ke lapho ngathi," Kwanele ngalokhu. ' Iminyaka engamashumi amathathu nambili ngisebenza ezindabeni eziphathelene nokudla, sengikulungele ukwenza okuthile - ngizohlinzwa, ngehlise isisindo bese ngiqala phansi. ”

Lapho uLampanelli elahlekelwa isisindo, wabona ukuthi ingxenye yenkinga ayebhekene nayo ukuthi ngenkathi eyedwa eqala umjikelezo wokudla, amahloni ayezizwa ekudleni amqhubela kude nokuba sendaweni yokuzamukela.

Ngokubheka emuva, wabona ukuthi ubona sengathi angazikhuthaza ngokuzenyanya “ngoba sikhuliswe ngaleyo ndlela, ukuthi ukuthethiswa ngokushintsha wena,” kusho yena. "Umuntu othile uthe kimi e-workshop eKripalu, 'Akekho umuntu owake wenza ushintsho unomphela ekuthethisweni ngabantu.'”

Kepha futhi wabona ukuthi wayengeke nje aqale ukuzithanda. Okokuqala kwakufanele aqale ngokuzamukela yena. “Ufuna ukwazi ukuthi kungani kungakaze kusebenze kimi ukuzibuka esibukweni bese ngithi,‘ Ngiyazithanda ’? Ngoba angikwazi ukusuka enzondweni ngiye othandweni, ”kusho yena. "Ngingaze ngithande okhalweni lwami namathanga nezikhwama zesihlalo sami nezingalo zami ezinkulu noma yini ... Kodwa ungathi, 'Lezi izingalo zami namuhla.'

Ukwamukelwa kungaholela othandweni ngelinye ilanga. ”

Futhi kungekudala, okutholwe nguLampanelli ukuthi ukungazizwa uwedwa, ukuzizwa uxhumekile kuwe nakwabanye, nokuthola nokuba yingxenye yekhwaya yakho bekuyinqubo. Futhi empeleni, kuyinqubo egcwalisa leso sikhala nobuze okuza nokuba wedwa.

“Umsebenzi wansuku zonke. Futhi ayisoze yaphela. Akukhulunywa, ngolunye usuku ngavuka, futhi ngazithanda. Yiminyaka neminyaka yokusebenza kanzima, ngisho nalabo bantu abazithandayo banosuku abangasebenzi ngalo, ”kuchaza yena.

KuLampanelli, okuningi kwalowo msebenzi onzima uqala ngokulunga ukuthi uyedwa - ikakhulukazi ukuthi akabandakanyeki ebudlelwaneni bezothando.

“Sengikwazi kahle ukuba ngedwa manje. Ngiyayithanda. Kodwa kwangithatha iminyaka engama-40 ukufika lapho. Ngibona sengathi abantu bacabanga ukuthi awujabuli ngempela uma uthi ujabule wedwa, ngoba akuvamile, ”kuchaza yena. “Akuvamile ukuthi abantu bangafuni‘ uthando. ’ Nganele.

“Futhi uma abantu bengangikholwa, kulungile.”

Futhi ngokunethezeka ngokwengeziwe ngokuba yedwa, uLampanelli uzizwa sengathi uyakwazi ukuhlala ngokukhululeka kude nobudlelwano obunobuthi. Impilo yami yinjabulo engamaphesenti angama-99. Ngakho-ke kungani umema noma ngubani empilweni yami osusa leyo njabulo? ” ebuza.

Ngenxa yalokhu, ukwazile ukugxila kubangani nomndeni abamenza azizwe exhumeke kakhudlwana futhi angahlali yedwa. Ubuye wasebenzisa cishe izinyanga eziyisithupha esiza ukunakekela ubaba wakhe owayeseshonile ngesikhathi egula. Ngicabanga ukuthi ukudlala nokunakekela ubaba kusize kakhulu ekugcwaliseni umgodi, ”kusho yena.

Futhi useyitholile ikhwaya yakhe futhi. “Ngikwenzile engifisa sengathi indawo yonke ibibeke phambi kwami ​​ekolishi, okuwukuba nomphakathi omkhulu wabangane, ukuhlangana masonto onke kwabangane nomndeni ngobusuku bemidlalo, futhi nomndeni wami omangalisayo ufinyelele sonke isikhathi, ”kuchaza uLampanelli. "Ngakho-ke bekufanele ngilulame yedwa."

Ngaphezu komsebenzi awenza ekwelapheni ukuhlala yedwa, wabona nokuthi ngisho nokuhlinzwa okwenziwa esiswini, kunomsebenzi oqhubekayo okumele wenziwe ukuphatha isisindo sakhe.

“Manje njengoba sengithole ukuhlinzwa, engingakwenza nje ukuqhubeka nokwenza umsebenzi wezemizwa lapho ngilambile‘ hhayi ngilambile ngokomzimba. Kufanele ngibuze, ‘Ngempela? Ngabe ngilambile ngokomzimba? Ngabe ukudla kuzokwenza ngcono lokho? ' Cha. Ngoba njengoba besho ku-AA, uma uphuza inkinga, manje unezinkinga ezimbili. Ngakho-ke inkinga ayisuki ngoba usebenzise utshwala noma, kimi, ukudla, ”kusho yena.

Manje njengoba uLampanelli ezizwa enethezeke ngokwengeziwe ngaye kanye nesisindo sakhe, usekwazi ukulinganisela kangcono ukwamukela iziphambeko zakhe ngokuzibophezela.

“Kwesinye isikhathi, njengamahlaya, kufanele sizibize ngenkunzi. Yinto leyo phakathi kokuzamukela ukuthi ungubani futhi ungazivumeli ukuthi ungabi senkingeni, ”kuchaza yena. “Ngizamile ukudla ukudla okunempilo, ngahluleka. Kodwa ngemuva kwesonto, kufanele uzibize ngeziqu zamehlo bese uthi, ‘Kulungile, ungazidedeli. Kungani ungekho? ' Futhi kufanele uqaphele ngalokho. Kunomehluko phakathi kokuzithanda uze ufe ... nokuzibophezela.

"Ukubiza inkunzi, kodwa ube muhle ngakho."

Ucabanga ukuthi ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, amava akhe ekusebenzeni ekudleni kwakhe amnikeze amava amahle kakhulu angakha phezu kwawo. “Unomlando ongakufakazela,‘ O, sengike ngakwenza lokho phambilini, ’kusho uLampanelli. “Angikwazi ukukwenza njalo. Kodwa ngiyasikhumbula leso sikhathi. Ngakho-ke, manje likhona ithemba. ”

Futhi ngo "Stuffed," uLampanelli unethemba lokuhlanganyela ulwazi lwakhe ukuze abanye bangazizwa bebodwa futhi behlukanisiwe lapho belwa nezinkinga zokudla nezesisindo.

Ufuna ukusiza abanye abanezinkinga zokudla ukuba bacabange, ‘Angiyena umuntu oxakile. Akumina ngedwa oya esiqandisini bese ngidla yonke nje into esendlini noma ngisho nokuncane kakhulu ”ngoba ngizizwa ngingedwa.

Ngenkathi lo mdlalo usize uLampanelli ukuthi azizwe eyedwa futhi engenalutho, ukugcwalisa ukungabi nalutho komuntu kuyinqubo eqhubekayo. “Akujabulisi yini ukuthi ukungabi nalutho ngaphakathi njalo kufanele kugcwaliswe? Ngicabanga ukuthi umdlalo usize kakhulu ngokugcwalisa umgodi. Kepha wenzani lapho lokho kuphela? Ingxenye yami iyazibuza, ngemuva kokuthi lo mdlalo usuphelile, ngizowugcwalisa ngani umgodi? ” uthe. “Ngiyethemba umgodi mncane. Ngiyethemba iyancipha. Bekulokhu kuncipha njengoba ngikhula. ”

Futhi unethemba. "Kukhona umugqa emdlalweni lapho ngithi," Angisoze ngalungiswa. ' Kuyinqubo. Kepha iba ngcono futhi ibe ngcono. Ngizobe ngisebenza kulokhu ngize ngibe neminyaka engama-80. Futhi anginandaba. Ngisendaweni engcono kulo nyaka kunangonyaka odlule.

"Futhi ngangisendaweni enhle impela ngonyaka odlule."

Thenga amathikithi e- “Stuffed.”

Lo mbhalo uqale ukuvela kuThe Huffington Post ngo-Okthoba 7.

UMichael Friedman, Ph.D., ungudokotela wezengqondo eManhattan futhi uyilungu leBhodi Yezokweluleka Ngezokwelapha i-EHE International. Landela uDkt Friedman onTwitter @DrMikeFriedman no-EHE @EHEintl.