Isixhumanisi Esiphakathi Komama BaseNarcissistic ne-CPTSD

-Delile

• Ukufundwa Okubalulekile Kwe-Narcissism
• Ukulinganisa ukulawulwa ngokungekho emthethweni: Izinto Esizenzela Umuntu WamaNarcissist

Uma sicabanga ngesifo sokucindezeleka kwangemva kokuhlukumezeka (PTSD) imvamisa sibhekisa esimweni esiyimpendulo kumcimbi owodwa futhi obonakala ngezimpawu ezinjengokubuyela emuva kohlupho lokuqala. Sivame ukuzwa nge-PTSD kumongo wamaqhawe omzabalazo abhekane nokuhlukumezeka okuhlobene nokulwa; futhi singakuhlobanisa nabantu ababone okwethusayo, okufana nengozi, noma abahlukunyezwa ngokocansi.

Ngo-1988, uJudith Herman, uprofesa weClinical Psychology eHarvard University, wasikisela ukuthi ukuxilongwa okusha — okuyinkimbinkimbi ye-PTSD (noma i-CPTSD) —kwakudingeka ukuze kuchazwe imiphumela yokuhlukumezeka kwesikhathi eside. ¹ Ezinye zezimpawu phakathi kwe-PTSD ne-CPTSD ziyefana — kufaka phakathi ama-flashbacks (ukuzizwa sengathi ukuhlukumezeka kuyenzeka khona manje), imicabango kanye nezithombe eziphazamisayo, nemizwa engokomzimba kubandakanya ukujuluka, isicanucanu nokuthuthumela.

Abantu abane-CPTSD bavame ukuzwa:

• Ubunzima bokulawulwa ngokomzwelo
• Imizwa yokungabi nalutho nokuphelelwa yithemba
• Imizwa yobutha nokungathembi
• Imizwa yomehluko nokungaphumeleli
• Izimpawu ze-Dissociative
• Imizwa yokuzibulala

Izimbangela ze-CPTSD zibangelwa ukuhlukumezeka kwesikhathi eside futhi, yize kungabangelwa yinoma yikuphi ukuhlukumezeka okuqhubekayo-njengokuhlukunyezwa kwasekhaya noma ukuhlala endaweni yempi-kuvame ukuhlotshaniswa nokuhlukumezeka okwenzeke ebuntwaneni. Ukuhlukumezeka okusobala kobuntwana ukuhlukunyezwa ngokomzimba nangokobulili nokunganakwa ngokomzwelo.

Kepha ukuhlukunyezwa ngokomzwelo, yize kunzima kakhulu ukukuthola, kungadala ne-CPTSD. Futhi ukuhlukunyezwa okungokomzwelo kungumongo wokuhlangenwe nakho kwalezo zingane ezikhula nomama oyisidlwangudlwangu. Endabeni yobudlelwano bomama nengane bokuhlukumezeka, ukuhlukunyezwa ngokomzwelo kuzofihlwa njengezibopho zothando, kuthathe isimo salo lonke uhla lokuziphatha olwenzelwe ukukulawula, ukukugcina usondelene, futhi ube nakho ukubuyisela kuye lokho udinga ukubona ukuqinisa ukuzethemba kwakhe.

Esinye sezici ezinzima kakhulu sokuba ingane kamama we-narcissistic ukuthi intshisekelo yakho eyinhloko kuye yikhono lakho lokusetshenziswa kuye. Uhlobo luni lokusetshenziswa onalo kuye oluncike ekutheni uluhlobo luni lomlimi oyisichaka.

Sivame ukuhlobanisa i-narcissism nalezo zinhlobo ezinkulu ezihlala zifuna ukuba yisikhungo sokunakwa. Kepha abakwa-narcissist bathatha zonke izinhlobo namafomu futhi i-narcissism yabo ayichazwa kuphela ngokwesidingo sabo sokunakwa, kepha maqondana nesidingo sabo sokulawula imvelo yabo nokuzivikela kwabo, ngokusebenzisa abanye.

Umama wakho kungenzeka ukuthi wakusebenzisa njengomuntu ukumvikela kumyeni wakhe, njengomuntu ozoba umngani wakhe omkhulu, njengomuntu ongabeka phansi futhi agxeke ukuze ezizwe kangcono ngaye. Noma ngabe yikuphi ukusetshenziswa abekade ekucabangele wena — nezingane kuyingxenye enkulu “yokuphakela” komlindi — cishe uyobe uhlangabezana nengcindezi eqhubekayo ngokwedlulele kule nqubo.

Ezweni elikahle, uzovunyelwa ukuba ukhule umane uyingane, uthokoze ngenkululeko yokuzihlola nokuziveza. Izingane zomama abathandanayo abavame ukukuthola okunethezeka lokho, kunalokho, bahlala bebheke emahlombe abo ukuthi babone yini ukuthi bacasule umama wabo ngokusho noma ngokwenza okungalungile. Bayazi ukuthi into ebaluleke kakhulu emhlabeni ukuzama ukujabulisa umama wabo futhi baphile esimeni sokwesaba njalo uma kwenzeka bengakutholi kahle. (Kuthatha iminyaka eminingi yokufunda ukwazi ukuthi yini edingekayo ukuze “uyithole kahle,” iyinkimbinkimbi kakhulu imithetho yama-narcissistic kamama).

Ngabe ukuthola igama elinokhahlo, ukugxeka, ukuphika ulwazi lomuntu kubi kangako njengokushaywa ngempama ngenxa yokuziphatha okubi? Impendulo inguyebo ocacile. Ubuthi bomlomo umama angabukisa ngabantwana bakhe buvame ukweqisa futhi konke okwesabisa ingane njengokushaywa ngempama. Futhi kanye nokwesaba ukudideka okungapheli. AmaNarcissist abuthakathaka kakhulu ngokomoya futhi enza iwebhu eyinkimbinkimbi kakhulu ukuzilawula ukuze enze lokho akwenzayo futhi angahlangani nakho. Njengengane, imizwa yakho ingathathwa njengengamukeleki ngokwemvelo uma iletha noma yiluphi uhlobo losongo kumama wakho.

Ake sithi uyamthanda ugogo ozala ubaba wakho kodwa wazi ukuthi unyoko unomona ngaye. Esikhundleni sokuthi ukhululeke ukuveza uthando lwakho, ungazithola usho izinto ezimbi ngogogo wakho ukujabulisa umama wakho.

Noma ake ucabange ukuthi uyingane ephumayo ngokwemvelo kodwa wazi ukuthi umama wakho uba nomona masinyane uma umsusa ekukhanyeni. Ukuveza nje ukudabuka noma ukwesaba kungahlangatshezwa ngokuhlekwa usulu nokuhlekwa usulu. Umama washada nobaba ngokwengxenye ngoba wayevela emndenini ocebile ukwedlula yena futhi kuye, ukuba mnandi ngokwezimali kwakuyisibonakaliso sokuqala sokuthi sasiphila impilo elula. Noma yikuphi ukukhuluma okungokomzwelo kokuthi izinto zazingaphansi ngokuphelele empilweni yami — nginesizungu nosongo olunzima lwemicabango yokuzibulala elenga phezu kwami ​​njalo — kwahlangatshezwana nokuzivikela okubukhali okwakwesabisa futhi kuyihlazo ukuba sengozini yokwamukelwa.

Ukufundwa Okubalulekile Kwe-Narcissism

Ukulinganisa ukulawulwa ngokungekho emthethweni: Izinto Esizenzela Umuntu WamaNarcissist