Amawele Akhethekile Wokusondela Abelana

Ukusuka kokuhlangenwe nakho kwami ​​njengewele futhi ngisebenza ngokungapheli namawele ayo yonke iminyaka, ngingaphetha ngokuphepha ukuthi iningi labantu lenza iwele libe njengokududuzayo nokukhethekile, okucatshangwa ukuthi kubandakanya umhlaba wobungani obukhethekile obukhethekile. Ukulwa, okuwudaba olucacile lwamawele, kwenziwa kukhanye ngisho nalapho ukufutheka okusobala kusobala. Abazali, abangane, abanye ababalulekile, ngisho nodokotela bengqondo bazothi, “Zama nje ukuzwana. Thumela iwele lakho ikhadi le-Hallmark. ” Kepha ukuzwana kunzima ngamawele. Ukuthukuthela eweleni lakho kubuhlungu futhi kuyadida kepha futhi kuyisibonakaliso sokucinga okujulile kobunikazi obuyingqayizivele.

Amawele okuphila kwangempela, uma kuqhathaniswa nezithombe zamawele, empeleni abhekana nezinselelo zokuba ngabantu abanobunikazi obuhlukile futhi obuhlukile.Kusukela ebuntwaneni kuqhubeke, amawele azilinganisela komunye nomunye, okudala umona nokudumala kumuntu nakuwele lakhe. Ukuzwana ngokunciphisa umkhawulo wokuncintisana nokunciphisa okulindelwe okungenangqondo kuwuhambo lwempilo yonke. Ukuthatha igxathu lokuqala lokufunda ukuthi uhlukile kwiwele lakho umzabalazo omkhulu. Umshikashika wokuchaza umehluko uhilela ukwakha umqondo wobunye wakho osuselwa kokuhlangenwe nakho kwangempela komuntu, nokuqonda imingcele ye-ego-okungokwelinye iwele nokuthi yini okungelinye iwele. Ukuqonda imingcele ye-ego kudinga inani elibucayi lokuziqhenya nokuzimisela ohambweni lokuba ngumuntu. Ukulwa okuqhubekayo kwemingcele ye-ego, ukwabelana, kanye nokuzibophezela kubhebhethekisa "izinkinga amawele abhekana nazo" ekuzwananeni.

Ukuqonda Okusha Kobudlelwano bamawele (UBarbara Klein, uStephen A. Hart, noJacqueline M. Martinez, 2020) basikisela ukuthi kungani kunzima ngamawele ukuzwana, ukusebenzisa imfundiso yamawele kanye nezindaba zangempela zamawele alwela ukuba yiwo futhi ahloniphe iwele lawo. Umsebenzi wethu, ukusebenzisana namanye amawele, nawo uphakamisa amasu okuthuthukisa ubudlelwano bamawele.

Isibonelo, lapho ukulwa kwenza izinkinga zibe zimbi kakhulu, bese uzama ukumisa uhlobo lokuxhumana oludala izimpi.

Kufanele uyeke nini ukunakekela iwele lakho? Impendulo eyiyo, kuphela uma kunesidingo.

Ngaphezu kwalokho, kuxoxwa ngezinkinga ezikhethekile zokuba yiwele ezweni elingesilo elewele. Ukuqonda ukuthi ungahlalisana kanjani nozakwethu, ontanga, nabaphathi kuboniswa ngezindaba nangamagama angempela amawele.

Ekuphetheni, umfutho wobudlelwano bamawele ubhalwe emazwini amawele. Kuchazwa isifaniso sokuthi ubudlelwano bamawele bungafana nokuhamba ngama-roller coaster okuguqukayo / okubumbekayo kusuka enjabulweni nokwabelana ngentukuthelo nokudumazeka.

Impumuzo amawele ayizwayo lapho efunda noma ezwa amanye amawele abelana ngobuhlungu bawo nobudlelwano bawo obungaziwa ngamawele ayaphilisa futhi ajulile. Umlayezo ojulile we- "Understandings New of Twin Relationships" ngukuthi ukuba yiwele kuyinselelo engasetshenzwa ngomzamo nangokuzimisela. Ukuthatha kalula ukuthi ukuba yiwele kulula kuholela entukuthelweni engaxazululiwe engenakunqotshwa. Kungokuzimisela kwangempela ukuba ngabantu abasondelene kuphela lapho amawele angathola khona izinzuzo zamawele.

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