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Kwanele, vele. Uyemukelwa Kokuthi Ungadabukisa Kanjani: I-Blog.

Yini Konke Lokhu?

Eminyakeni engamashumi amabili edlule, isayensi yokusebenza kwengqondo ibikhathazwa ukufuna injabulo. Ngenkathi abelaphi phambilini bebegxile ekunciphiseni ukuhlupheka okwedlulele, muva nje sihlolisise ukuthi singabakhuphula kanjani abantu ekungenelisekeni okuhlukahlukene kwezingadi baye ekugcwalisekeni okuphezulu.

Ngomqondo othile, lokhu akufanele kudingeke. Yize ubumpofu namashwa kudlangile emphakathini wanamuhla, akukho lapho asondele khona ngokujwayelekile njengoba ayenjalo emvelweni yethu yokuziphendukela kwemvelo. Sinezimoto, uphahla, izinhlelo zokunakekelwa kwezempilo, oveni bama-microwave, nobhiya wobuciko. Sisebenza, ingxenye enkulu, endaweni ephephile ngokufanele. Silala emibhedeni entofontofo. Sinamathuba angenakuqhathaniswa kwezikaqedisizungu.

Uma isikhulu seNkathi Ephakathi sazithola sesitshalwe kabusha saya eMnyakeni Wekhulu lama-21 eNyakatho Melika, sasizocabanga ukuthi sesifikile ezulwini.

Kodwa bheka nxazonke.

Ukungajabuli kusizungezile. Abezindaba bakhuluma ngenkinga yezempilo yengqondo, yize sisebenzisa imali ethe xaxa ngempilo yengqondo yomuntu ngamunye kunanoma yisiphi isikhathi emlandweni wethu. Izinga lokudangala liyakhuphuka, hhayi kuphela ngoba siqhubeka njalo sandisa incazelo yokudakumba ukufaka inani elikhulu labantu. Kulabo abangatholakali benokucindezeleka komtholampilo, abaningi abanelisekile ngezinga lenjabulo abayitholile ezimpilweni zabo.

Uma isiko lingumshini wokukhiqiza injabulo yomuntu, okwethu kubonakala kungasebenzi - futhi kungasebenzi kahle. Mhlawumbe kufanele sibheke futhi sibone ukuthi konakelephi.

Inkambu ye-psychology enhle inkulu embonweni wamandla wesiginesha. Uma, ezweni lenala, sikwazile ukudala usizi olungaka, mhlawumbe ukungajabuli kungamandla ethu esiginesha. Masisisebenzise ngokugcwele.

Ukuma Kwezinto Ezizayo

Le bhulogi iphefumulelwe incwadi yami Indlela Yokuba Usizi: Amasu angama-40 Osevele Uwasebenzisa (IHarbinger entsha, i-2016). Ngizokhuluma ngamabhithi avela encwadini, nangamasu angavelanga emakhasini ayo. Ngizokhomba izici zomphakathi ezingaba nomthelela ekungajabuleni kwabantu. Ngizokwethula ucwaningo olufanele. Ngizophakamisa ukungabaza ezinye zezimangalo ezinkulu kakhulu zempilo yengqondo, umm, imboni. Engikuyona ingxenye enganqeni.

Ngingathanda futhi ukuthi ibhulogi okungenani isebenzisane ngandlela thile. Ngezikhathi ezithile ngizophrinta izinhlamvu no-Q no-A izingcezu. Kuze kube manje, ngicela ukhululeke ukungibhalela lapha ePsychology Today. Kubandakanya:

• Izindlela zokuqeda injabulo yakho, ukwaneliseka, nomdlandla.
• Imibuzo mayelana nokusebenza kwengqondo okuhle, ubunzima bemizwelo, nokugcwaliseka kwempilo. (Ngicela uqonde, kepha, ukuthi angikwazi ukunikeza izeluleko zokwelashwa kule nkundla.)
• Izihloko ongathanda ukuthi ngizihlanganise.

Kancane Ngami

Ngingudokotela wezengqondo osebenza eVancouver, eCanada. Ngo-2002 ngasungula i-Changeways Clinic - igama elimangazayo ngendlela engacabangi engalisebenzisa enkonzweni engangikade ngiyisebenzisa esibhedlela i-UBC - iTransways Programme. Manje sesinama-psychologists ayi-14 ahlinzeka ngokwelashwa kokuziphatha kwengqondo nokunye ukwelashwa okususelwe ebufakazini bokukhathazeka, ukudangala, ukushintsha kwempilo, ukukhathala, ukucindezeleka okuhlobene nempilo, nokunye okuningi.

Izincwadi zami zifaka i-How to be Miserable, The Assertiveness Workbook, Your Depression Map, ne-Private Practice Made Simple. Ngesikhathi sami sokuphumula ngisebenzisa ingadi yezithelo emaphakathi neBritish Columbia, ngitshala ama-apula, amapheya, amapentshisi, amabhilikosi, ama-cherry nama-plums. Asinazo izilwane ezihlosiwe, noma izivakashi zethu zifaka izinyamazane, amabhere, ama-cougars, ama-beavers, ama-otter, nama-rattlesnakes.

Kunzima kancane kuma-rattlesnakes ngokunambitha kwami, kepha hheyi: impilo ayiphelele.